Features

Naturally I was shocked to learn that Contra Costa's law enforcement task force commander Norman Wielsch was involved in prostitution. But I was more shocked to read that, even with a unique competitive advantage — i.e., being able to use his badge to shut down other massage parlors — Wielsch still couldn’t make a financial go of it!  

I think the problem was the name he chose for his shady Pleasant Hill massage parlor. "My Divine Skin" just didn't do justice to Wielsch's unique contribution to the world of sexual commerce. With better branding, I believe, Wielsch could have used the police angle to attract a much larger clientele.  

Some of the choicer names that come to mind include: "Cops and Rubbers," “Pat-down Palace,” "Cop-a-Feel," “Hands behind your Back,” "Thin Blue Lie-in," "Arresting Ladies," “Police Me/Puh-leeze Me” and, for the Nevada franchise, "STD: Las Vegas." And to draw in the fetish crowd, how about: “Beat Patrol,” “Spread ‘Em,” “Get Down, Now!” “Taze Me, Bro” and “Cuff Me, Dano.”