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Self-affinity, in which we feel comfortable within our own skin, and in which we value and appreciate ourselves, can be hard to achieve. I am not entirely there yet.  

Regardless of what anyone tells you including those who are antagonistic and think they know better, there is nothing wrong with liking yourself. It is not the same thing as conceit. And, even if it did qualify as conceit or egocentricity, no one else has the right to say you can't have that.  

When it is combined with obnoxiousness, as is the case with Donald Trump, it can create a lot of enemies. However, in its pure form, self-affinity can coexist with being considerate of others. Liking yourself isn't the same thing as being a sociopath.  

Liking yourself should be unconditional and should not be contingent on achieving something, being "important," having a college degree, or being employed. When self-appreciation requires that you live up to someone's or your own expectations, it isn't the real thing.  

Muhammed Ali a great boxer, who later became a great statesman, when interviewed by sports commentators in the 1970's, would say "I am the greatest." Other role models, individuals who decided they are good enough, include Erin Brockovich, Hillary Clinton, and Suze Orman. These people decided they were "good enough," and great success followed. Liking oneself doesn't mean that you must be famous. However, valuing oneself sometimes leads to tangible success.  

Yet, fame and/or success do not bestow the ability to like oneself. There are numerous examples of people who have achieved big fame and fortune, who are nonetheless insecure people. This is why a number of famous people have had disastrous and sometimes tragic lives. Liking oneself has to come from the inside, and not through external circumstances.  

Many persons with mental illness have problems with self-image due to how they react emotionally to their diagnosis. It doesn't help that those in charge of treatment presume to be intellectually and otherwise superior to those being treated. This can lead to resentment or it can lead to buying into the falsehood that we are "less." When we think we are a lesser person, we become a lesser person.  

However, if we disbelieve other people's fiction of us being inferior, and as a result are resentful, we need to learn positive ways of channeling that. Anger doesn't have to lead to behaving in a hostile manner. I have heard it said that "the best revenge is living well." Anger can be converted into the motivation to do better.  

Having a psychiatric disability doesn't have to stop us from liking ourselves. We don't have to be rich and famous, an overachiever, or even employed, in order to create self-approval. Self-approval is an end in itself, and it provides a much better feeling on the inside. When you are okay with yourself, it won't matter as much what gets accomplished or not accomplished.  

How is self-approval attained? It is something that can be learned, and it is a structure made of thoughts. Cognitive exercises can lead to self-approval. An exercise could be to get out a pen and paper and start to identify self-trashing thoughts, and then decide that each of those thoughts are unnecessary. You could also identify thoughts that say something good about you, and confirm those thoughts. Simply repeating to oneself and incorporating the thought that says, "I am okay," is yet another exercise. You can also devise your own exercises.  

If we feel bad about ourselves, this is composed of negative thoughts that falsely say we are a bad person. To combat negative thoughts in general, it can help to realize this is just something that the subconscious mind is producing and that these are merely thoughts, and these thoughts are probably not accurate.  

If you have schizoaffective disorder, it is a mood disorder in combination with psychotic symptoms. Depression for someone with schizoaffective can be severe and should be combatted with a combination of antipsychotic medication, possibly an antidepressant, and definitely a lot of cognitive therapy.  

I have learned to be happy even during those times when my mind would otherwise make me miserable. This is achieved by looking beyond the output of my mind and seeing that there is a lot about which to be thankful.  

When in any type of conflict, I have learned to be on my own side rather than siding with an opponent and helping them trash me, verbally, physically or otherwise. There is nothing wrong with looking out for oneself, so long as this doesn't become nastiness in various forms.  

The mental health treatment system tries to convince us that we are intrinsically ill and need their help and their guidance. The mental health treatment system tries to tell us who we are. We do not need to allow treatment providers or anyone other than us define us. Who we are is up to us to decide, and efforts to better our condition and our predicament follow from there.