Public Comment

In the past, some psychologists theorized that schizophrenia passes from one generation to the next because the parents are or were "schizophrenogenic." This was a way of blaming parents for the disease of their offspring. Schizophrenia is a physical disease that impacts consciousness and affects numerous other things. Calling parents schizophrenogenic is like blaming the parents when a child has cancer or arthritis. There is no difference. 

People incorrectly believe it is shameful to have a mental illness. Families at one time kept their mentally ill family member a secret. At a guess, this is the same kind of thing that may have once happened when a family member was LGBTQ. 

When I first became ill, there were very hard circumstances in my life that contributed to the first episode. This constituted an environmental factor. Psychiatrists who dealt with me were unaware of this. Yet, had circumstances been better, it would only have delayed becoming ill by maybe a year or two--it wouldn't have prevented me from getting psychotic. I have memories of paranoid thinking that date back to the mid nineteen seventies, when I was in my early teens and when life wasn't especially hard. 

My behavior in my mid to late teens made my life much harder than it had to be. I attribute these behaviors to the beginnings of becoming ill. No one taught me to behave like a jerk. 

Since the time I became ill, around 40 years ago, family members have been a huge source of support. In 1982, family didn't know what they were dealing with in me. They were probably frightened, both for my sake and theirs. My behavior was bizarre and violent. My speech wasn't making sense. I was leaving notes that didn't make any sense. I recall I'd written a note and had put it on the outside of the front door to our house--attached to the wood of the door with a sharp object. I was also jailed. Once I was released and stabilized on medication and supervision, it was probably a huge relief for family members. 

I recall my eighteenth birthday celebration took place at the dining hall at Gladman Psychiatric Hospital in Oakland. Family gave me a lot of chocolate. It was to become almost a family custom to give me chocolate when I was sick, in the repeat episodes that I experienced later--which invariably were caused by medication noncompliance. 

Family helped me get through the hardest times I've ever experienced. And when I had well times, family expressed to me how they were very proud. In my twenties I had a pretty good career repairing home electronics. I worked both for repair shops and on my own. 

The support of family in getting well should never be underestimated. The connections go beyond being sick, beyond having inexplicable behavior, and beyond apparently not amounting to as much as I'd hoped. This is not to say there were never arguments. Yet, once I got past the ordeal of that horrible first psychotic episode, I'd learned in some part of my brain how not to become violent and how to prevent being charged with a crime. 

Since the time I was in my mid-twenties, family has expected that for the most part, I should fend for myself. Beginning in 1989, no family member had space for me to continue living with them. This had nothing to do with punishment--they simply did not have space to house me. I was told I had to get a job and support myself or get on Social Security and move out either way. They believed, correctly, that I was capable of being on my own. And this is a good thing. I see it as an affirmation, a vote of confidence, and not as a rejection. Many families continue to let their mentally ill offspring live at home. This may make a bad situation worse, or it may work well for some families. 

Many families of mentally ill offspring face the dilemma of taking care of their loved one at home versus making them live elsewhere. It is a personal decision and entirely up to individual families--none of anyone else's business. Many people with mental illness just can't make it on their own. On the other hand, having a mentally ill offspring living at home well into middle age could be very uncomfortable. This is one reason there should be more resources to help adult and aging mentally ill people. 

Me and my spouse, while we have our disagreements, are here for each other. And maybe this is what family looks like in the future. Yet, no one can predict the future. 

To get tangential, living forty years with schizophrenia and functioning as well as I do is an accomplishment. Many people may doubt that I was mentally ill in the first place. This is because my most recent fully blown psychotic episode was in 1996, and it was due to noncompliance. Even then, family helped, as did the person I would later marry. 

Family helps provide a reason to keep going. If I didn't have family, not just to bring me into the world, but to help, I wouldn't be here.